The 20 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week Sept 25-Oct 1

The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our day with their brilliant and succinct wit. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious musings of 280 characters or fewer.

Scroll through this weekâ€™s great tweets from women below, then visit our â€œFunniest Tweets From Womenâ€ page for past roundups.

how long could a doctor leave you in an exam room before you considered like, popping your head out to ask whatâ€™s going on. for me i think about seven hours

â€" Brandy Jensen (@BrandyLJensen) September 30, 2021

the avengers: "the city is saved"

the city: pic.twitter.com/qyQ8RxsriN

â€" ð"«ð"®ð"¬ð"´ (@becksvault) September 29, 2021

iâ€™m gonna be unstoppable once i figure out what my whole deal is

â€" cass city (@HeavenlyGrandpa) September 27, 2021

i be like â€œgood morningâ€ then go back to sleep 3 times ðŸ˜‚

â€" CHANELâ™'ï¸ (@nellyyyjayyy) September 29, 2021

Just about everyone I know is a snack getting stuck in a vending machine away from total collapse

â€" Meredith Ireland (@MeredithIreland) September 30, 2021

i lost my sunglasses in the laundry a couple days ago & asked the super to keep an eye out. today he found them & told me in detail exactly what happened: â€œi saw the security video. you were eating a bag of chips & they fell off when you tilted your head back to finish the bagâ€

â€" 99 Ricki Lake (@cataxista) September 29, 2021

When people ask me why Iâ€™m in a wheelchair, I want to say something ridiculous like â€œMy mom fed me pinecones when I was a baby.â€

â€" Lindsay (@Rollinintheseat) September 27, 2021

ah yes, nicholas braunâ€¦ the pete davidson of michael ceras

â€" hot girl midsommar (@verymimi) September 27, 2021

Starting a job feels like youâ€™re a new character on the ninth season of a tv show.

â€" YKTFV ðŸ‡¬ðŸ‡§ (@Gold_Apparels) September 27, 2021

crazy that u can have a job where u are responsible for saving a human life or u can have a job where u need to send an email but dont

â€" Rebecca Weiser (@rebweis) September 28, 2021

got really excited about japanese politics for a minute there pic.twitter.com/u7FDKIuZlj

â€" Mary Tobler (@MaryTobler) September 29, 2021

Straight break ups are great because the guy is always like â€œshe really traumatized me when she told me how much I hurt herâ€ meanwhile the girl is like â€œsome things he did could be considered a felony in certain states but I swear heâ€™s not a bad personâ€

â€" abby govindan (@abbygov) September 26, 2021

Do you ever start your period and be like â€œwell that explains a lotâ€?

â€" Manuka Honey (@kionnajay) September 27, 2021

with all due respect if I am watching a show from 1999 on a streaming service I want all the commercials to be from 1999

â€" danielle weisberg (@danielleweisber) September 27, 2021

i think my biggest issue with dating apps is that by nature they eliminate a friends to lovers plot line

â€" Alex (@alexgmurd) September 27, 2021

Me: *wears glasses, facemask and hoop earrings*

My ears: Yo? Should I carry your bag too?

â€" ðŸ¦š (@3dLooks) September 29, 2021

a gentleman just carried a puppy into the library and when i looked at him askance said, "well i couldn't leave him in the car. he'd be sad."

â€" danielle tcholakian (@danielleiat) September 29, 2021

â€" slim (@slimsade_) September 27, 2021

I took an order for a baby shower cake that says "Welcome Gary" and I thought I misheard the person so I asked them to repeat it and they sighed and said "the baby's name is Gary..."

â€" kt ðŸµ (@kochsister) September 27, 2021

Itâ€™s embarrassing how much I care about the quality of dj transitions.